First two performances of the year didn't go very well. Not that I screwed up or anything, but there was just no audience. I'm rather disappointed with Taylor's. Not sure whether they were serious with this learning carnival thing or just wanted to waste some money. Anyway, that aside, Sunday's performance trumps Saturday's for one small little detail: there was a person(I think she is one of the counsellors) that actually clapped like crazy when I went one octave higher for "Sweet Dreams". You know, it's all this simple things that make me wanna continue performing(although my mum's trying to make me not perform for the rest of the year, good luck trying to). I've been thinking of this rock version of Nelly's "Just A Dream" while practicing "Sweet Dreams". Hope I can convince my bandmates to do it. *fingers crossed* Anyway, it's back to slaving away on my maths homework, both normal and further. I hate maths.

Those in Taylor's should know that there's this program called the tutor-tutee program. I'm pretty much involved in it. My Maths lecturer asked me to help this girl who is from another class but is in my maths class. Confused? Not important. Anyway, I help her in maths(obviously) and sit beside her most of the time in class, we also meet up for one hour every Tuesday. It was okay but honestly I'm only doing it half-heartedly. I don't really want to do this. Personally, I think it's a nuisance and I probably won't do it if my lecturer didn't ask me to. Everything's been going fine so far but now my tutee wants me to give her proper tuition every Friday. She's even gonna pay me for it. I've actually sort of agreed to give her the tuition. It was really a rash decision but after thinking about it, I found out that I really don't want to do it.

This might sound selfish but I want more free time to myself. Ever since I started A levels I've been getting tons and tons of Maths homework, both Maths and Further Maths. Most of my time is actually used to finish up my homework and I rarely find time to really sit down in front of the computer to play games and do whatever I want. In addition to that, my dad wants me to focus on Econs. He even bought me the Alain Anderton book which costs a fortune although I told him I could get it from the library.

The fact that she's gonna pay me for the tuition sounded a little tempting at first but I don't need the extra money. At least not for now. But that aside, I really don't feel like doing it. Every time I meet up with her, it's so awkward and I just don't do anything but help her if she asks. I'm not doing a good job and I really think that some other person could do a better job than me. Now, I just don't know how to open my damned mouth to tell her. Ish, I wish that I'd thought about this before I opened my trap.

Anyway, first performance of 2012 coming up this weekend. Gonna do an acoustic set plus Marilyn Manson's version of "Sweet Dreams" with 2 guitarists and a vocalist(I'll be on the piano and singing too =). It'll be for the Taylor's Learning Carnival which also doubles up as an open day. Hope that maybe some of you could drop by, I'm not exactly sure of the time but it'll most probably be the 11am-12pm slot.

signing off,
yijiun

Didn't realise it was March already until somebody posted it on Twitter. I'm just wondering what life has in store for me this year. It's just weird not seeing a lot of people ever since SPM finished. Some I really miss but some not so. Although there're a lot of Seafieldians in Taylor's but most of them are just the people I smile to when they walk by but I never talk to. Seriously I'm really grateful to be in the class I'm in. It's just stressless(new word?!) to be with them. Fun too.

SPM results coming out in a few weeks time and I don't know why I'm so scared. Many people seem like they don't care but for some weird reason I just feel ridiculously anxious and nervous everytime it comes into my mind. Let's just not talk more bout that. =S

Maths homework is neverending. When I finish the last piece of homework, more just comes my way. Maths was never my favourite subject. I actually hated it ever since primary school. But now I'm taking TWO maths subjects. Funny how life just takes a jab at you every now and then.

Just founded a band together with a bunch of strangers. All are nice people(albeit with a love for metal and hard rock). I don't really know what songs they're talking about most of the time but it's nice to be in the company of music lovers every now and then. The band still doesn't have a name but that's the least of our worries. Our very first gig coming up in two weeks time but we still haven't decided on a song and we have little time to practice. Fingers crossed. I hope that everything just comes together and we can put on a great performance for our debut.

That's all for now. Hopefully I'll update this blog more frequently.

with love,
yj

Just realised I've never updated my blog since college started, never knew I would be so distracted. Anyway, everybody probably knows I'm studying A-Levels at Taylor's with a bunch of other people that I know, seen, and tons of people that I've never seen before in my life prior to entering Taylor's.

When I started college, I thought that I'd be the person to just sit in class and rarely talk to people but reality surprised me in a good way for once. My classmates are very friendly and by now, the whole class is sort of united. For once, it's the class that makes the lectures fun and not the teachers. I like my class. =)

(This post was supposed to be posted 2 weeks ago but I totally forgot about it, haha, paiseh =P )

thoughts

Looking back on the videos I've made, I don't think I've done myself or my voice justice. For some reason I've been compromising on the quality of my singing or piano/guitar playing just to get the video finished and I honestly do not think that this is the way to go. Also, I've been getting comments on my choice of song and interesting input by people that I don't really know and I really appreciate that. To be honest, I prefer people to tell me to my face what's wrong instead of going, "that's good." I mean, even if you say it's good, how is it good? There's surely something wrong about it. But, the few videos I've put out are amateurish to say the least and just plain crap if I go about it the hard way. I'm aiming for just 100 views when others easily get a few thousand, and I'm not counting the real Youtube celebs. If I'm really determined to get what I want, I need to get serious. I'm giving myself a window of time to achieve what I want and that window of time starts now until I graduate from university. That gives me approximately 5 years, give or take a few months. And maybe, I need some time to reflect and do some soul-searching before continuing with this Youtube video stuff. I'm even considering closing down my Youtube channel and starting a new one when I'm ready, just to give myself a new start and rid myself of the past. I need time to really think about what I want and how I want to go about it, I feel the need to reinvent myself and get serious about what I want to achieve.

Signing off,
soul-searcher

P.S. I know that I have a song request pending and I'll keep it in mind. Sorry that I still haven't done the video for it yet but hopefully I will. =)

Why everytime got badminton I sure cannot go wan?????? =( Hmph...suan le, i go the amali talk and stare the day away on Thursday.

Anyway, I have a new video up on my Youtube account. I know there are a few mistakes here and there but i hope you guys don't mind =S Here it is :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNbR3nenwzE

College starts next week and I don't think there's anything to prepare for. Maybe a new bag? Let's just wait and see. A lot of friends joining Taylor's too as expected. But I most probably won't be in the same class as them. So I'm a little nervous. But I hope that I can make some new friends and still keep the old ones. =)

I've come to realise that some posts on this blog are a wee bit personal and I'm not really comfortable with everybody being able to read it but those posts are only a few. I have thought of making this blog private, I'm still thinking, but until now I don't think that this blog is so personal that only my close friends can read it. So for now, blog no private. But when it comes a time when I'm really uncomfortable letting total strangers read my blog then maybe I'll consider it.

2011

Just a few more days till the end of the year, did I make any New Year resolutions for 2011? Honestly I don't remember. I think I did post something about it but I'd rather not look back at it because I know that I probably didn't achieve any of them. Looking back, the year hasn't been that bad for me. I didn't win any competitions or anything but I did end my schooling year with a performance at prom which pretty much beats everything else. Oh, not to mention the under-the-radar performance with Mok at the Eco Ranger's AGM which was awesome too. Let's not talk about exams because most people will probably shoot me full of holes if I did. So, let's talk about other things like...hmmmmmmm......I don't know really. Working on the Editorial Board of Minda is nothing to shout about other than the fact that En Yusdin pissed off almost everyone on the board, scouts,hmmmm....scouts. I loved Outdoor Camp this year because it was my last and I finally could go for Flying Fox. I helped to build a fire so that we could cook eggs. It was fun but still my last. Missed CFN prep this year thanks to the parent factor and SPM. But, I still remember lugging food from the classrooms all the way until the bengkel only to realise I forgot the forks and spoons so I had to run all the way back to get it. CFN was tiring but fun. Kah Seng&Co really did an amazing job. =) Fast forward to prom. Ummmmm....to be honest, prom sort of missed the mark for me. I wasn't satisfied about my performance, food wasn't great(FN was way better), nearly threw up backstage, rehearsal dragged till 5. It just didn't live up to all the hype. Oh, the videos. Most of the videos with me in it on Youtube have 100+ views except the newest one which seems to have stalled at 93(hint hint). SPM was just SPM. It was just like any exam I'd take just a little more formal. So, all in all, an interesting year filled with a healthy mix of disappointments and the opposite of that(don't know the word =P). I can't wait to see how the year ends for me.

Signing off,
YiJIUN

I'm finally back from Turkey!!!! Seems nothing much happened while I was away except for the post spm holiday which was finalised and I wasn't going anyway, and the 6D gathering was also finalised. Hmmmm....

Anyway, Turkey was fun, without the puking. Don't know why I puked, no fever no nothing just me and myself. But, it was okay. I didn't miss much except some rock formations(which were supposed to be awesome only I didn't see them), a museum, some food and a bellydancing+folk dance show. Not much really. I got to spend the most time in the hotel and experience a local's driving which was pretty much like my dad's driving.

Visited two big mosques, seroiusly big but not much to see. I don't know why the Blue Mosque is called the Blue Mosque because it ain't that blue. The hot air balloon flight was awesome but damn cold. Whoever who says that the fire used for the hot air balloon will warm you up is crapping. The fire is for the balloon, not the passengers. I think most of the 7/8 days spent at Turkey was mostly for sitting in the bus and sleeping in the hotel. Sightseeing wasn't amazing except for at Cappadocia(don't know whether I spelt that right) but that day I was sorta sick, but I saw most of it already thanks to the hot air balloon.

Another thing about Turkey is that the tour is like a Sejarah class. Alot of the history of Turkey was about the Greeks, Romans and Ottomans who were called Uthman in our Sejarah textbook, I think. I probably learned more about our Sejarah textbooks than I did when I actually read it. Was it boring? Nope it wasn't. All thanks to my awesome tour guide who was hilarious the whole way. If he was my Sejarah teacher, I'll score 90 in every exam although I don't really remember much of what he said now. =P

You know the Trojan Horse? Yea, I visited the ruins of Troy, which I didn't know was in Turkey until I read the itinerary. It was interesting. And there was the wooden horse there. A fake one though, with windows so you can stick your head out for pictures.

One thing I noticed is that there are ruins everywhere and almost every place I see is a UNESCO world heritage site. But then tourist spots are usually a world heritage site. Oh, that reminds me. There was this place with calcium carbonate formations and hot springs. It was beautiful but to walk on it was torture. We had to take off our shoes and we weren't allowed to wear slippers so we had to walk on hard rock. My feet were so damn sore after that.

The worst part about Turkey was actually the food. The one thing I cannot not have is good food. The food there was rather bland and not to my taste. They love to cook things with tomatoes and stuff desserts with sugar, alot of sugar. But it's just my problem. Evidently Turkish people have no problem with their own food. But Malaysian food is definitely a thousand times better, how can you have omelette without onions?

But overall it was great. The hotels were nice anyway. I have some key chains but not much cos I don't know how many people I'll see. So please don't be mad if I run out before I see any one of you guys. =)

Signing off with lotsa love,
YiJiun

Listening to Christina Perri's A Thousand Years which I just put onto my Mixpod, I just realised I ended my high school life forever. I'm glad I didn't write the essay about graduating from school just now when taking Chinese Paper 1. I'm pretty sure my answer booklet would've been drenched in tears if I did. Damn the song, it's making me cry and it's not even about the meaning of the song but the atmosphere it's creating. High school has been an amazing part of my life that I'd never want to or will forget. I don't care if it's bitter or sweet memories because these memories are the ones that have shaped me into a person I never thought that I'd become. Somebody that I do not regret becoming. To all my friends, close or not, I'm happy I came to know you. Whether or not we meet again in college, it's pretty much fate. I'm pretty much at a loss of words here, I don't know what else to write when there's so much I want to tell my friends. It's something you can never put into words. That's how much I love you guys. It's irritating that when something you want to end ends and coincides with the end of another thing you don't want to end. Calling all the fruits, I HEART U <3

SPM is finally over for me. Now, I'm unwrapping books bought just a little over a month ago. Book reading spree =D (hao bin, inheritance will have to wait =P)

Anyway, now I've successfully rekindled my love for my guitar. Partly thanks to the new video. More to the new tuner I bought. Having red and green lights blinking sure beats straining my ears to listen to the piano. That reminds me, my piano hasn't been tuned in like, two years. So that's why my guitar sounded weird....anyway, this time I'm gonna learn how to play the guitar properly, not the half-hearted effort I made two years ago when I bought my guitar. This time I'm gonna learn it nice and proper.

Anyway, I'm flying off to Turkey in two days time. So I'll be MIA for bout a week or so. Don't waste money trying to contact me ya. Roaming is expensive for both you and me. =)

Last but not least, good luck to all my friends and whoever else who are taking their EST exam tomorrow. =)

Signing off,

YiJiunChan

P.S. I'm on Twitter =D

160

Just finished the first week of SPM. Wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, especially Sejarah.

"Apakah nama lagu kebangsaan negara kita?" Rubbish question. In fact, the whole paper was filled with so many KBKK questions I was wondering whether they mixed up the questions for BM with Sejarah. BUT, an easy paper could mean that A+ will be harder to get. :O

I'm really aiming to get that RM18k from Taylor's and if just one of my subjects doesn't get an A+(excluding Chinese), then I'll have to settle for less. Well, maybe I could move next door :P Apparently Inti College is offering a full scholarship for any pre-u programme if one can get 10 A's which includes 8A+. Alot easier to achieve compared to Taylor's. Honestly, I'm wondering why Inti was never in my consideration. Maybe I should make a visit there when I have time.

Physics is scaring me out a bit 'cos somehow I feel Physics is rather unpredictable. Although tuition teacher says its easy, I don't really think so. Hmmm.....

Moral next Monday is also scary in a way, 'cos if I don't get my non-nilai questions right, my A+ could just slip out of my hands. Haiz.....

Anyway, good news(to me), my video of "Someone Like You" has almost TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY VIEWS!! Not alot but it's a ton for me =) Hope the prom video can break the 100 barrier like my other videos did. Go watch it!! Here's the link =)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slY41VPlGTc

Bye for now =D

Just watched the video of my performance during prom. Guess it didn't tun out as good as I thought. Some parts sounded horrible. =(
But, I'll learn. In time. Hopefully I'll get a chance to perform again in the near future. But now, I'm just focusing on SPM. When that's over, maybe I'll go scout around for gigs XD

PROM!!! Heehee....best night of the year =)

Finally performed on stage after going to many auditions and stuff. The performance was great thanks to all my friends who cheered for me like crazy. Did you know that I was so nervous backstage that I kept feeling like throwing up????? I was so scared I couldn't perform properly. But everything turned out alright. Thanks to Kah Seng for lending me his awesome hat which turned out to be damn attention grabbing. And also credits to MOK for the awesome pics. I LOVE my fb profile pic. Hehe...

Well....now that it's over, I can finally focus on my studies without worrying about the performance. Aiming for at least 9A+ and 2As although Chinese will probably not be an A. It's actually possible that 10A+ could be easier to achieve. But, I'm just gonna study hard and do my best. Then at least I won't regret when results come out =)

Back to bio now....bye~~~~

You know that feeling you get when you realise you have tons of things you don't know although the exam is less than a month away? It's terrible. This time it's an enormous thing. I really have no confidence whatsoever of achieving targets set by other people for me. If it's up to me, I'd rather pass every subject and go on with life but I can't. People expect me to get straight A's because apparently there are so many people getting straight A's that I would be lousy not to get it. Stupid but it's what my parents think at least.

Then there's the issue of college. Now I feel stupid that I didn't go for the Principal's Award thingy by Taylor's College. That would have helped my parents save a bit of money first cos I'm not sure I can get much out of the other one which depends solely on my SPM results. >.<

I'm still trying my best to study properly and get as many things as possible into my head but everything seems to be just passing through my brain like it's a rest stop. When it's rested enough, it goes. I can't remember things for more than a day or so. ISH!!! I'm pretty sure I'm gonna freak out during SPM.

On a lighter note, I finally got a spot to perform on Prom Night. But, till now, I'm not sure about the arrangements for rehearsals and things. They said they were gonna get in touch with me but till today I only know when rehearsals are starting and nothing else. I gotta arrange transport, people!!! Now, I keep my handphone by my side just waiting for an sms or a call. Irritating lar...

On an even lighter note, my video of Someone Like You has over 120 views already. Cheers, that's more than the Born This Way video. =)

Back to study now.

P.S. when you see me on facebook, that doesn't mean I'm not studying. I'm doing the trial papers from other states.

Pendidikan Seni??? =0

Surprised at the number of people who thought I'm taking Pendidikan Seni for SPM. LOL!!! Super big compliment, hahaha....

But, honestly if I went for art classes and knew how to use water colours properly then I would have took Art. Haha, weird coming from me right?

Actually, I really like doing art and everything. Been like that since young. When I was still like 3-4 years old, I'd take the water colours in the house and start to conteng a piece of paper. Then, when I spill the palette on the floor, my mum would scold me. Haha, memories.

Even in primary school, whenever I get an A for an art piece I'd show it proudly to my family and gloat about it for a few days. I was damn happy at making nice things. I remember the unfinished Seni folio I did in Form Two. I was really proud of it, but I dumped it because I didn't have place to put it. Now I regret it. I'm still keeping the Form 3 one though. ;)

Maybe after SPM, I'll go for a few art classes to learn how to use the damn water colours. =)

LOL, I guess this could be the weirdest confession I've ever made....who ever thought I would like SENI????