Sorry for the late update. This post is only the latest on this stressful period that I'm going through at the moment in my life.
As you have probably surmised, term has ended and I officially will not have anymore teaching lectures. Parts of my university are slowly ending as time goes on. No more teaching left, just assessments. Any Glee stuff will be winding down now in Term 3 with exams. I didn't think that I would be so affected by my time in university but it has honestly been a pretty transformational experience. Probably even more so than high school. I've been through stuff that really helped me understand myself so much more than before and that's, in no small way, because of the people that I have met in university. It will be sad when I finally have to leave.
The past 7 weeks or so has been an emotional rollercoaster. My job search has not been going well. There were times when I thought that it was completely hopeless but I just kept suppressing my emotions. I kept moving on because I knew that I still had outstanding applications and there was still a faint possibility of me actually getting a job here in the UK. Then, one day, I got rejected from both my outstanding applications. In that moment, I genuinely felt like my world ended. For one of the applications in particular, it wasn't even because I did anything wrong but the company just ran out of spaces. I felt cheated and really demotivated. It didn't help that I was also burdened with a lot of work I had to do for uni. But thanks to kind words from close friends, I managed to pick myself up and continue with my quest for a job.
That weekend after I got the bad news, I followed the Glee Masters team down to London for the annual show choir competition. I was a bit sad that I couldn't join the team this year because of my work load but I decided to support them in any way I could. Spent a great day in London hanging out with the team and also got to meet up with alumni who came down to watch the competition as well. That was a good day.
The week after that was a bit of a nightmare trying to get two group projects finalised for the following week. For one of them, we had to do an analysis with Excel but my group mates were really struggling to work out how exactly to use Excel, so I ended up doing most of the work which really annoyed quite a bit. I know that it really isn't their fault to some extent but still...sigh. Anyway, those were done in good time and everything is fine now.
I will finally be going out tonight. Can't wait to have a good time tonight. A brief respite from all the work that I have to do. In the following weeks, I have 4 essays to write and a couple of interviews to attend.
I actually feel sad that I increasingly feel disenchanted with home now. Malaysia's a nice place and all but I cannot see myself staying there for the rest of my life. It is honestly depressing to say that because it's a place that I still call home. There are just so many issues with the political scene, human rights and the direction the country is heading in general. I actually don't see it getting any better in my lifetime and if I have a chance to lead a less repressed life here, why not?
Signing off.
YiJiun
P.S. Check out the last two covers I posted up! Both are pretty upbeat.
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